Dear Earth, help me receive your love.

We were visited by an 88 year old Reverend Canon, the friend of a member of our Buddhist congregation. She joined us for service, chanting nembutsu, circumambulating around the tall golden Buddha, and bowing as far as her body would allow her to.

Afterwards over decaffeinated coffee she spoke of a retreat she’d recently attended. She said that, in the silence, she’d realised how hard it was for her to receive Christ’s love. During the retreat, she prayed that she might allow it in.

I find it hard to receive your love, beloved Earth.

I fill my schedule with activity, distracting myself from what’s hard to swallow. I worship other fickle gods – popularity, sense pleasures, security. I get caught in the treacle of feeling-unworthy. I fall back into the belief – how tempting it is! – that I can control everything if I try hard enough.

All these things get between me and you, Earth. They stop me from noticing blackberries fattening on the hedgerows. They don’t let me linger when the warm sun kisses my cheeks. They pull my attention from our old cat, who’s bones are protruding, and who just wants his head fondled.

I will pray for the ability to receive your love, great Earth. The more nourishment I allow in, the better I’ll be able to hold the darkness as well as the light. The more sweetness I allow in, the more devoted I’ll be to loving you back.

My cheeks are warm, Earth, and my old cat is purring. It feels good.

Love, Satya <3