Dear Earth, are holidays allowed?

I’m just back from a holiday in Shropshire with Little Dog and my husband. As I walked along Ellesmere lake eating ice-cream, dear Earth, I knew that your lungs were burning.

How can I sit in cafés or visit castles or read trashy detective novels when I could be doing something to help you, Earth? Something, anything, that would subtract from the sum of pain in the world?

I am struggling to write about this. I want to say, we all have limits, and respecting them makes us better helpers. I want to say, when we offer compassion we should always include ourselves. I want to say, hey, everyone deserves a break once in a while.

These things are true. And – your lungs are still burning. Your skin is still clotting with carbon. Your lid of ice is still dissolving, drop by drop. How can I rest?

It is essential to rest, but not as much as I do. I didn’t need a holiday. I could have carried on without one. Sometimes I rest because I am a foolish human being with many desires and preferences. I rest because I enjoy it.

I think I need your help, beloved Earth. I don’t want to avoid my grief for the extinction of the blue macaw. I don’t want to hide my disappointment in myself. Please help me to make room for these feelings, so I can carry them even whilst I disappear into TV or take unnecessary afternoon naps. Please help me to make space for the sadness alongside the quiet pleasure of comforts, the appreciation of abundant gifts, the wild joy.

I want to tell you everything, Earth. If I can’t be honest with you, then who?

Love, Satya <3